After 10 years, we’re done (with martyrdom)

A Wish Come Clear is 10 years old this week. I published the first post on January 16, 2011. To quote Captain Awkward – a fellow 10 year blogging veteran – this makes the blog “1 bajillion years old in blog years.”

In hindsight, it’s easy to see that starting the blog was a good choice: It’s now a thriving community with thousands of kindred spirits gathered here. You, dear ones, are the reason that I wrote (and got a book deal for) my forthcoming book, You Don’t Owe Anyone.

Yet there were plenty of reasons why it was crazy for me to start a blog back in 2011. I had a stressful, more-than-full-time job, plus a mysterious malady that left me exhausted all the time.

So what changed? Why did I begin?

It reminds me of a listener question from The Pursue Your Path Series last year: “What one thing prompted you to pursue your path?”

The truest answer I can give is: Losing people I love.

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The very real pain of not giving up

Dear one,

It’s not like you thought it would be, is it? To put it mildly, this past year did not go to plan. It was a reckoning, in every sense of the word.

We’ve seen just how tenuous our “normal” is, just how quickly life as we knew it can end. And so perhaps you’re looking ahead to this new year and feeling a strange mixture of terror and anticipation.

Will things get worse before they get better? Will COVID be a memory by this time next year? Where are we in the scope of this struggle?

Of course, I don’t have the answers. For now, we are still in the middle. There’s hope on the horizon, it’s true, but we can’t gauge the distance yet to travel.

The middle is the keep-on-keeping-on part. It’s the trudge of one foot in front of the other, the seemingly endless march. It’s tough to do, in writing and living.

It’s the hardest part of the story.

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The Most Likely Way You’ll Take Back Your Time

Having a baby has changed the way I make choices.

Time with Baby Girl McGraw is such a big YES for me that it puts every other decision into sharper focus.

“Do I want to take on this project?” turns into, “Do I want to trade an hour with our long-awaited little one? Do I want to source childcare for this time? Is it worth it to me?”

I’m hooked on the fierce clarity. But the challenge, of course, is to translate thought into action – to LIVE from that place of integrity.

Is this something you struggle with, dear one? Then let me tell you about a magical phrase that helps me.

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