Meet Caroline

An ongoing mystery in my life is how best to respond when people ask, “What do you write about?”

This question is hard, both because it’s broad and because the answer is always evolving. It’s difficult to put into words what I … well … put into words.

(That said, you can visit CarolineMcGraw.com for a virtual resume, including a traditional bio, a list of publications, praise from fellow writers, and so forth.)

But since you’re here, let’s talk. My Myers-Briggs type is INFJ, and I love going past shallow-end small-talk and wading into deeper conversational waters.

What do I write about?

Forgetting and remembering.

My favorite narrative arc goes like this: “Caroline forgets that everyone, including her, is irreversibly, unconditionally loved. Myriad struggles ensue. Then – jubilation! – she remembers.”

caroline-mcgraw-tedx-2016-kate-rexrode-smith-photography-lo-res-1

Light-bulb moment at TEDxBirmingham’s 2016 All Star Salon; photo credit Kate Rexrode Smith Photography

It’s funny how often I forget basic spiritual truths. For example, I have a tendency to look for peace and contentment everywhere except where I can actually find them: within.

I persist in thinking that if I can just get everything under control … if I can get all my ducks in a row … then I will be happy.

You’d think I’d have learned by now that this is crazy. I can effect personal change – by showing up and showing love, by being brave and telling the truth – but I am not in charge of capital-L Life.

Really, it wouldn’t be advisable for me to take the wheel. After all, my very best experiences and relationships have all taken me completely by surprise. You’d think I’d have figured out by now that my plans are not the be-all and end-all.

But no. I have amnesia, and I want to drive the bus.

As my friend Glennon Melton writes at Momastery:

“It’s like we really only need to know ten true things but we have to keep learning those ten true things fresh and new forever. We are like Dory from Finding Nemo. Being Dory makes spiritual progress difficult.”

Oh, yes. Want to know what I’m like? I am like Dory. I have a kind heart, a lot of enthusiasm, and a short-term memory issue.

As such, I keep asking Life if She and I could just pull over and swap places, if I could please be in control of everything for a bit. Fortunately, Life knows me better than I know myself. When I try to take Her seat, She doesn’t get offended.

Instead, She just smiles at me with infinite kindness. She listens as I rant about how things should be. She waits for me to remember what I already know, which is that She’s Love, and She’s taking me – taking all of us – home.

Won’t you join us on the journey?

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