Ever Wish You Had Permission to Just Be Human?

Did you know that certain Native American artisans weave small, purposeful mistakes into their blankets?

It’s true. Some master craftspeople include intentional slip-ups in their best work. Why? Because they believe that the ‘mistake’ is the very space that allows Spirit to move in and out of the fabric.

Take a moment and let that sink in. Then ask yourself …

What if the very mistakes you wish you hadn’t made could be openings for Spirit in your life?

It’s a subversive question, especially for a personal development blog. The stereotypical personal development site is all about the elusive quest for an ideal life.

But let’s get real here. We’re human beings, not paragons of perfection. We all wrestle with fear, self-recrimination, and shame.

I spent years terrified of making mistakes. Here’s my rap sheet: honors student, team leader, high-achiever, and recovering perfectionist.

Fortunately, I’ve realized that the real question isn’t Will I screw up? Rather, it’s How will I allow Spirit to move through the fabric of my life?

A Wish Come Clear is a personal development blog for real people who make mistakes, fall down, and dare to rise again.

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What If You Stopped Making Yourself Miserable and Chose Joy? (6 Year Anniversary Video)

Happy Anniversary to us, friends! It’s been six years since the first post at A Wish Come Clear, so I recorded a video to celebrate and to share some exciting news as well. 

Click here to watch the video on Youtube, or just press play and read the approximate transcript below. 

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Hello! I’m recording this video to celebrate A Wish Come Clear’s six year anniversary. I started this blog in January 2011, and wow, I am amazed at all that has happened since then.

I’ve learned a lot, but one of the best lessons has been to focus on the energy of joy.

Whatever it is you’re trying to build in life, focus on feeling and sharing joy, and it will grow in ways you can’t imagine.

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They Tried to Make Me Go To Rehab, and I Said Yes.

Friends, do you remember back in March when I wrote to you – albeit indirectly – about the blizzard that hit my life?

I’d prefer to keep that crisis vague and metaphorical; it suffices to say that I went through something tough. That’s one reason why I’ve been quieter than usual on the blog this year. (That, and writing a book.)

When I wrote about the hard time, I described it as “a slow-motion train wreck with no end in sight”, and it was. But there was still hope. I just couldn’t see it.

First, I needed to take a trip to rehab … but not for the reasons that you might imagine!

Despite the cheeky post title, no one “tried to make me go to rehab”. I sent myself there, and it was one of the best choices I’ve ever made.

When the opportunity arose last summer, I traveled to San Juan Island in Washington State to learn about addiction recovery at a place called The Clearing.

This is not a stock photo; it really was this beautiful.

The Clearing is a residential, non 12 Step dual diagnosis addiction treatment program.

Translation: they help people heal the underlying core issues that drive addictions and substance abuse.

They teach people how to recover from trauma, let go of limiting behaviors, and generally not hurt themselves anymore.

As such, today’s post, The Golden Child Goes to Rehab, is a guest post on The Clearing’s blog.

If you’ve ever struggled with perfectionism, overwork, and other socially-acceptable-but-still-way-unhealthy behavior, then this story is for you.

{Disclosure note: I’ve worked for The Clearing as a digital copywriter and blogger since January 2016. I am a self-employed contract worker and not an affiliate. The staff and participants just offered light to guide me through a dark time, and I will always be grateful.}

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(The sign says it all.)

“Once upon a time on the way to high school, I got into in a serious car accident. My car was totaled, and I was a mess too. While I waited for my parents to arrive at the scene, my hands wouldn’t stop shaking, and I couldn’t catch my breath.

When the initial shock wore off, my usual responsibilities started coming back to me. My third-period biology class was tough, and I couldn’t afford to miss a lesson and fall behind.

Though my parents tried to convince me to come home and rest, I wouldn’t hear of it. In my way of thinking, I’d already screwed up by getting into an accident, so missing school was out of the question.

Have you ever felt that way? Have you ever believed that you couldn’t compound a mistake by taking time to recover?

Ever had something traumatic happen and then tried to get right back to your usual schedule, acting as though it didn’t affect you?

You may think that addiction looks like using needles and taking pills, and often it does. But it can also look like a girl who refuses to rest, someone with relentlessly driven, “successful” behavior.

It’s a different definition of addiction, sure, but it’s no less real. In the end, all forms of addiction are about realizing: I’m not running this anymore; this is running me.”

Read on at The Clearing’s blog: The Golden Child Goes to Rehab.

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Ever received help just when you needed it most? Join the conversation in the comments below.

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You Don’t Owe Anyone An Interaction: The TEDx Talk

Here’s one way I could tell this story …

A few months ago, I was accepted to TEDxBirmingham’s All Star Salon. I worked hard and delivered my 5-minute talk, You Don’t Owe Anyone An Interaction, on September 13, 2016.

In the talk, I addressed concerns over my viral blog post of the same name. I discussed how, in this age of hyper-connectivity, we can still give to others without getting burnt out. Today, I’m thrilled to share the video with you!

That’s one version of the truth.

But there’s another version that I want to entrust to you.

There are a lot of overly simplistic success stories out there. According to these triumphant narratives, all you need to do is work hard and believe in yourself and eventually you’ll live your dream and never doubt yourself again.

But what if that story doesn’t ring true? What if you give your best effort and you still don’t feel good enough?

What if the spotlight reveals your weakness rather than your strength?

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