The Risk of NOT Being Busy

When my husband Jonathan and I moved from DC to Alabama five years ago, the biggest culture shock wasn’t the Southern accents, but rather, the less busy pace of life.

It was the stunningly slow turns that drivers made into parking lots. It was standing still at a four-way stop because everyone wanted to let everyone else go first.

(As a New Jersey native, both of these drove me bananas. Just go already! You could not get away with these shenanigans in New York!)

But the biggest change of all was the sudden halt of my own busyness.

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Ask For What You Want; You Just Might Be Surprised

Do you dare to ask for what you want in life?

If we’re honest, a lot of us would answer, Not often.

This is totally understandable. After all, asking for what you want brings up all kinds of insecurities and fears. It feels so freaking risky, like middle school dances all over again.

ask for what you want

We think …

Who am I to want this? It’s too big for me.
No one has time. They’re too busy. They’ll never say yes.
What if they think I’m crazy? (What if I AM crazy?)
I’m not good enough. I don’t deserve it. I have to be realistic.
I have to wait until I am 100% ready.

The excuses sound good in our heads, but deep down we know better. If we don’t ask, we‘ll never know what far-off dreams might be within reach.

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You Don’t Owe Anyone An Interaction: The TEDx Talk

Here’s one way I could tell this story. A few months ago, I was accepted to TEDxBirmingham’s All Star Salon. I worked hard and delivered my 5-minute talk, You Don’t Owe Anyone An Interaction, on September 13, 2016.

In the talk, I addressed concerns over my viral blog post of the same name. I discussed how, in this age of hyper-connectivity, we can still give to others without getting burnt out. Today, I’m thrilled to share the video with you!

That’s one version of the truth.

But there’s another version that I want to entrust to you.

There are a lot of overly simplistic success stories out there. According to these triumphant narratives, all you need to do is work hard and believe in yourself and eventually you’ll live your dream and never doubt yourself again.

But what if that story doesn’t ring true? What if you give your best effort and you still don’t feel good enough?

What if the spotlight reveals your weakness rather than your strength?

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