The Price We Pay for Delaying Decisions

What do you do when you’re not sure about a decision? If you’re like me, you debate it endlessly in your own mind. You go over the pros and cons. You try very hard to figure out what the best choice might be. But all of this striving is exhausting. And often, we expend so much effort trying to make the “perfect” decision that we don’t make a choice at all.  …
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When Your Family Doesn’t Support Your Dreams

“How do I practice self care and pursue dreams with a family that say they support you until it is inconvenient for them? (Leaving my family is not an option.)” Wow, what a great listener question! What do we do when the people closest to us don’t support our dreams? If you’ve ever wrestled with that issue, then click here to watch the new, 11:56 minute video. …
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6 Ways to Get Rid of Perfectionism Even When Excuses Abound

“How did you start to get rid of perfectionism and make the steps to become an author? How did you transition from living your “past life” to the life you have now?” Here’s what I know: Perfectionism is fancied-up fear. To paraphrase Liz Gilbert in Big Magic, it’s fear in a fur coat. Perfectionism may seem classy and high-functioning, but deep down it’s just you being afraid. How to overcome fear in four words? Ground yourself in love. That’s the larger principle, but what does it look like to LIVE that truth, day in and day out? Here are a ...
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Put On Your Own Mask First (Yes, You Really Can)

“Nice try,” the counselor said with a kind smile. “But there’s one thing … ” He bent his head to write on my paper, and I frowned. I’d labored over the words of the affirmation, trying hard to get them exactly right. It was one of my first workshops at The Clearing, the residential rehab where I spent a month learning how to heal the underlying core issues that drive substance abuse. (Though I didn’t use drugs, my work as a digital copywriter and some unexpected struggles opened a door for me to participate in the program.) Our participant group ...
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For the Ones Who Hide Away When They’re Struggling

“Hi friend, how are you doing today? Thinking of you and sending love your way.” I press send on the text, then click my phone screen off. I know better than to expect an immediate response from friends who hide away when they’re struggling. My friend deals with depression and anxiety, and I know that this is a challenging time for her. I also know that when things get tough she tends to go dark. Still I send the message and the love anyway. I pray that it can help her to defy the voices that tell her that she’s ...
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Do You Know What Keeps You From Thriving?

Have you ever had a friend make you a generous offer that you couldn’t accept … even though you wanted to? Have you ever stopped to realize that this is what keeps you from thriving? Well, I have. This past week, I’ve been dealing with some health issues, and when my friend Laura found out, she offered to bring me chicken soup. My first thought was that that sounded like exactly what I needed. My next thought, however, was that I shouldn’t accept. …
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Terror, Triumph, and Taking the Stage: Lessons from TEDxBirminghamSalon

Friends, a funny thing happened when I started writing about what it was like to speak at TEDxBirmingham: I kept using plural pronouns. I kept writing, “We traveled, we spoke.” Don’t worry, there’s a simpler explanation than schizophrenia. I wrote in the plural because I felt your excitement and encouragement as a tangible presence at TEDxBirmingham, and I cannot thank you enough for that. Plus, you helped me choose my topic; I based the talk around this post. Your thoughtful responses galvanized me to write and speak about our shared struggle with perfectionism. I’ll post the text of the talk ...
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Confessions of a Recovering Perfectionist

Have you ever had your life get flipped, turned upside down? No, really, my fellow recovering perfectionist – I want to know. This isn’t just an excuse to quote the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air theme song. I want to know if you’ve had every shred of confidence swept away. I want to know if you’ve stood in the clearing, terrified of the emptiness around you. And most of all, I want to know if you’ve come through stronger than you were before. …
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What Would You Do With No Arms and No Limits?

Have you ever seen someone whose courage just took your breath away? Well, I have; his name is Richie Parker. At the time of this writing, Richie is in his 30s, and he works as an engineer for Hendrick Motorsports. Before I share the rest of the story, though, I have to tell you that this is not the post I had planned for today. But my birthday is coming up; this week, I’ll be 29. And people keep asking if I’m worried about nearing the big 3-0. Part of me understands the anxiety. But another part of me thinks ...
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Spend It Offering Light: Week 1

Today is the day: our new series, “Spend It Offering Light” (#OfferLight) starts now, with essays from Brooke Adams Law and Abby Norman! This recent post inspired the idea, and the stories I’ve received have been breathtaking. “Spend It Offering Light” features real people turning their fears into something that helps others, into light. …
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