Why Do I Feel Bad When I Spend Money On Myself?

I used to have so much trouble spending money “just for me.”

In college, I worked three jobs, volunteered, and tithed hundreds of dollars to my church … and I couldn’t pull the trigger on a $15 gift for myself.

Before I graduated from Vassar, I wanted to buy a coffee mug from my favorite cafe … but I couldn’t do it. Spending money on that “selfish” purchase was too anxiety-producing.

Why do I feel bad when I spend money on myself? I wondered. 

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I Thought I Needed to Feel Strong (I Was Wrong)

“How do I overcome low self esteem when I don’t really like much about myself?

People would say to me when my father was dying, “You’ll be stronger.” Yet I recently got into a verbal disagreement with someone at work, and I was so angry I wanted to cry and it showed.

I don’t feel stronger or resilient, why is that?

That listener question from The Clarity Course survey spoke right to my heart. So, I recorded this video for her … and for YOU.

If you’ve ever thought that you should feel stronger or better than you actually do — if you’ve ever fought to overcome low self esteem — then click here to watch the new, 5:33 minute video.

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The Day I Threw Them All Away

You guys, I finally did it.

I finally got rid of my old business cards.

It wasn’t an easy choice to make. I’d been so proud when I ordered them! They had really pretty pictures! Wasn’t it wasteful to let them go?

Earlier this week, though, I finally tossed the remaining stacks into the recycling.

Why? Because I got clear on one thing: Keeping those cards meant holding onto the past.

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