Ask For What You Want; You Just Might Be Surprised

Do you dare to ask for what you want in life? If we’re honest, a lot of us would answer, Not often. This is totally understandable. After all, asking for what you want brings up all kinds of insecurities and fears. It feels so freaking risky, like middle school dances all over again. We think … Who am I to want this? It’s too big for me. No one has time. They’re too busy. They’ll never say yes. What if they think I’m crazy? (What if I AM crazy?) I’m not good enough. I don’t deserve it. I have to...
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What If You Stopped Making Yourself Miserable and Chose Joy? (6 Year Anniversary Video)

Happy Anniversary to us, friends! It’s been six years since the first post at A Wish Come Clear, so I recorded a video, What If You Stopped Making Yourself Miserable and Chose Joy? Click here to watch the video on Youtube, or just press play and read the approximate transcript below. *** Hello! I’m recording this video to celebrate A Wish Come Clear’s six year anniversary. I started this blog in January 2011, and wow, I am amazed at all that has happened since then. I’ve learned a lot, but one of the best lessons has been to focus on...
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They Tried to Make Me Go To Rehab, and I Said Yes.

Friends, do you remember back in March when I wrote to you – albeit indirectly – about the blizzard that hit my life? I’d prefer to keep that crisis vague and metaphorical; it suffices to say that I went through something tough. That’s one reason why I’ve been quieter than usual on the blog this year. (That, and writing a book.) When I wrote about the hard time, I described it as “a slow-motion train wreck with no end in sight”, and it was. But there was still hope. I just couldn’t see it. First, I needed to take a...
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You Don’t Owe Anyone An Interaction: The TEDx Talk

Here’s one way I could tell this story. A few months ago, I was accepted to TEDxBirmingham’s All Star Salon. I worked hard and delivered my 5-minute talk, You Don’t Owe Anyone An Interaction, on September 13, 2016. In the talk, I addressed concerns over my viral blog post of the same name. I discussed how, in this age of hyper-connectivity, we can still give to others without getting burnt out. Today, I’m thrilled to share the video with you! That’s one version of the truth. But there’s another version that I want to entrust to you. There are a...
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Your Truth Will Set You Free

Friends, this is the approximate text of a talk I gave at Living Spirit Church on Sunday, July 31, 2016, Your Truth Will Set You Free. Photo Credit: geralt, Pixabay You’ve heard the platitudes … Honesty is the best policy. Tell the truth and shame the devil. An honest answer is like a kiss on the lips. They make it sound simple, don’t they? As if telling the truth was so straightforward. But for those of us who are accustomed to covering up, getting real is … complicated. When you start speaking up after years of silence, you’ll discover the...
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What To Do When A Blizzard Hits Your Life

Dear Caroline*, One minute I had a good life. I was happy, and my family was happy too. The next minute, we received some terrible and unexpected news. Without going into detail, I can say that it has been devastating … a slow-motion train wreck with no end in sight. Surviving the present takes everything I have. I was in shock for a while. In a way I still am, but I’m getting through the days at least. Even though I still have a lot to be thankful for – a steady job, a safe place to live – it...
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10 Dead Giveaway Signs You’re People-Pleasing

Truth: I’ve had a draft of this people-pleasing post saved on my computer for months now. Why? Because it’s something that I scribbled down for fun one day. Since it’s a playful list post, a judgmental voice told me that I shouldn’t publish it. It wasn’t serious writing, so it wasn’t good enough. But then, light-bulb moment: maybe you don’t need serious writing from me all the time. As Glennon wrote on Momastery, “I convinced myself that everything I wrote needed to be shiny and shareable and big and amazing. So I started writing essays instead of love letters. Meh....
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Stop Believing Shame’s Lies (and a Giveaway to Help!)

Let’s face it, shame is sneaky. You want to stop believing shame, but it engulfs you like one of J.K. Rowling’s Dementors, those terrifying wraiths that drain happiness. Soon you’re locked in what author and researcher Brené Brown calls a shame spiral. …
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What to Do When You Feel Not Good Enough

Don’t you love how every epic saga starts with the main character going through their usual routine for the millionth time? Cinderella sweeps the hearth and endures the same familial abuse. Katniss goes to the Reaping and faces the same brutal injustice. Lyra prowls Oxford and hides from the same protective grownups. (If you haven’t read the His Dark Materials trilogy by Phillip Pullman, please cancel your plans and remedy this oversight immediately.) And then something bizarre happens. A fairy godmother shows up, a familiar name is called, someone slips poison into a glass. In a moment, the journey begins....
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