Can’t Stop Striving? Your Free Perfectionist Recovery Toolkit Is Here!

I knew I was a perfectionist the day I got into a car crash on the way to high school. The accident totaled our family’s pretty blue Chrysler Concorde, and I wasn’t in great shape either. Thankfully I didn’t sustain significant physical injuries, but I was hyperventilating, trembling, and generally traumatized. Still, my tears were barely dry when I insisted on going straight to school. Why? Well, I thought that since I’d already screwed up by getting into the accident and missing two classes, taking a day off was out of the question. Though I would never have asked a ...
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From Distraction to Connection: You Need to Read with Rachel Macy Stafford (Plus an Only Love Today Book Giveaway!)

How do you resist the addictive pull of phone notifications to be present to the people around you? How do you shift from distraction to connection? How do you find the courage to be yourself when your judgmental inner voice tells you that you have to be perfect? How do you make peace with your past mistakes and enjoy your life here and now? Welcome to the second edition of our new video interview series, You Need to Read. Today, we’re discussing these powerful questions with author and speaker Rachel Macy Stafford! …
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Ask For What You Want; You Just Might Be Surprised

Do you dare to ask for what you want in life? If we’re honest, a lot of us would answer, Not often. This is totally understandable. After all, asking for what you want brings up all kinds of insecurities and fears. It feels so freaking risky, like middle school dances all over again. We think … Who am I to want this? It’s too big for me. No one has time. They’re too busy. They’ll never say yes. What if they think I’m crazy? (What if I AM crazy?) I’m not good enough. I don’t deserve it. I have to ...
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What If You Stopped Making Yourself Miserable and Chose Joy? (6 Year Anniversary Video)

Happy Anniversary to us, friends! It’s been six years since the first post at A Wish Come Clear, so I recorded a video, What If You Stopped Making Yourself Miserable and Chose Joy? Click here to watch the video on Youtube, or just press play and read the approximate transcript below. *** Hello! I’m recording this video to celebrate A Wish Come Clear’s six year anniversary. I started this blog in January 2011, and wow, I am amazed at all that has happened since then. I’ve learned a lot, but one of the best lessons has been to focus on ...
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They Tried to Make Me Go To Rehab, and I Said Yes.

Friends, do you remember back in March when I wrote to you – albeit indirectly – about the blizzard that hit my life? I’d prefer to keep that crisis vague and metaphorical; it suffices to say that I went through something tough. That’s one reason why I’ve been quieter than usual on the blog this year. (That, and writing a book.) When I wrote about the hard time, I described it as “a slow-motion train wreck with no end in sight”, and it was. But there was still hope. I just couldn’t see it. First, I needed to take a ...
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You Don’t Owe Anyone An Interaction: The TEDx Talk

Here’s one way I could tell this story. A few months ago, I was accepted to TEDxBirmingham’s All Star Salon. I worked hard and delivered my 5-minute talk, You Don’t Owe Anyone An Interaction, on September 13, 2016. In the talk, I addressed concerns over my viral blog post of the same name. I discussed how, in this age of hyper-connectivity, we can still give to others without getting burnt out. Today, I’m thrilled to share the video with you! That’s one version of the truth. But there’s another version that I want to entrust to you. There are a ...
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Your Truth Will Set You Free

Friends, this is the approximate text of a talk I gave at Living Spirit Church on Sunday, July 31, 2016, Your Truth Will Set You Free. Photo Credit: geralt, Pixabay You’ve heard the platitudes … Honesty is the best policy. Tell the truth and shame the devil. An honest answer is like a kiss on the lips. They make it sound simple, don’t they? As if telling the truth was so straightforward. But for those of us who are accustomed to covering up, getting real is … complicated. When you start speaking up after years of silence, you’ll discover the ...
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How To Set Limits Like Liz Gilbert

Dear Liz Gilbert, When someone changes your life, it seems right to say thank you, doesn’t it? I hope so. But right or wrong, I’m a writer, and you of all people know what that means. It means that I can’t help telling the stories that want to be told. So here’s what happened when a group of friends and I showed up for your Big Magic event in Nashville. Not that this will narrow it down, but we were the group that was so excited to see you, clapping and whooping as you took the stage with Ann Patchett. ...
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10 Dead Giveaway Signs You’re People-Pleasing

Truth: I’ve had a draft of this people-pleasing post saved on my computer for months now. Why? Because it’s something that I scribbled down for fun one day. Since it’s a playful list post, a judgmental voice told me that I shouldn’t publish it. It wasn’t serious writing, so it wasn’t good enough. But then, light-bulb moment: maybe you don’t need serious writing from me all the time. As Glennon wrote on Momastery, “I convinced myself that everything I wrote needed to be shiny and shareable and big and amazing. So I started writing essays instead of love letters. Meh. ...
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Wanting to Leave is Enough

Let me guess: it used to be good. That job, that relationship, that volunteer position … whatever it was, it started out fine. But over time, things changed. Or maybe you did. Either way, you’ve got a secret: wanting to leave. …
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