You Don’t Have to Be Afraid: Overcoming Perfectionism on Poema

“The irony of overcoming perfectionism is that it’s like playing a video game where you have plenty of lives left, but you’re so scared of getting hurt by anything. And it’s like, ‘Dude, it’s okay! The game has more lives for you!'” This is a quote from my recent guest appearance on James Prescott’s Poema Podcast. I’m not sure why I started speaking like a California surfer – dude! – but I’m so glad to share the recording with you today. …
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When You’re Feeling Lost, Walk The Beauty Way (Our Seven-Year Anniversary)

We all know how it goes. We wake up in the morning, and from the moment we open our eyes, something feels “off”. There’s a barrage of anxious thoughts about work and laundry and that text we forgot to respond to yesterday. Where did these thoughts come from? Why are they slamming us now, before our feet even touch the floor? We don’t know. We just know that there’s already a feeling of dread within, and we haven’t even looked at our email or news feed yet. We feel lost and afraid; what can we do to bring even the...
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Defeat Self-Doubt, Trade Perfectionism for Possibility, and Live Your Dreams

When we were younger, we really felt it, didn’t we? And by “it”, of course, I mean life. Once upon a time, we had big feelings about everything from our birthdays to our breakfast cereals. We felt intensely; we threw our whole hearts into songs, books, and best friendships. I’m not saying that living this way was easy. There were tears and temper tantrums; there were moments when our bodies could barely hold the force of our emotions. It was hard, but it was real, no-holds-barred living. …
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When You’re Scared to Try, Remember This

Have you ever felt the desire to take a shot at something new – a job, a relationship, a dream – but then automatically shut yourself down? Ever told yourself, I’m not good enough or It’s too hard; I’ll never figure it out, so why bother…? If you’re scared to try, then I have a video story just for you. …
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What’s Beneath the Busy? I Dare You to Ask.

Truth-time, dear friends: we are really, really good at fooling ourselves. We say that we’re so busy, but what we really mean is that we’re scared to look at what’s beneath the busy. Our frantic activity functions like a drug; it gives us a high and helps us avoid feelings we’re afraid to face. If that’s you, there’s no judgment here. We’re all on this journey together;  none of us have it all figured out. …
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True Recovering Perfectionist? Then Press Play!

“We fear losing other people’s approval. We’re so scared of that, that’s so terrifying to us! But what actually hurts a lot more is when we completely reject ourselves.” This is a quote from my recent appearance on Claire Barton’s podcast, in an episode titled True Recovering Perfectionist. …
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Put On Your Own Mask First (Yes, You Really Can)

“Nice try,” the counselor said with a kind smile. “But there’s one thing … ” He bent his head to write on my paper, and I frowned. I’d labored over the words of the affirmation, trying hard to get them exactly right. It was one of my first workshops at The Clearing, the residential rehab where I spent a month learning how to heal the underlying core issues that drive substance abuse. (Though I didn’t use drugs, my work as a digital copywriter and some unexpected struggles opened a door for me to participate in the program.) Our participant group...
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For You, When You’re Facing Internal Conflict

Have you ever felt yourself deadlocked in internal conflict, bouncing back and forth between the comfort of staying put and the lure of letting go? Ever struggled to choose because part of you wanted something new, while another part of you needed to keep everything the same? I have. Once upon a time, I worked as a nonprofit program director in DC. It was a stable, undeniably meaningful job, one that connected me to a caring community and supported my deepest values. Those things were true, but there were other truths, too. There were the tears that prickled behind my...
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The Healing Power of Animals: You Need to Read with Julie Barton (Plus a Dog Medicine Book Giveaway!)

If you love your pets and believe in the healing power of animals … if you were a child who treated your stuffed animals as sentient beings … then you won’t want to miss this interview with Julie Barton, author of Dog Medicine: How My Dog Saved Me from Myself. When I read the last chapter of Dog Medicine, my husband found me curled up on the couch sobbing. He tried to take it away from me, but I said, “No, no, it’s good crying!” …
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