When You’re Feeling Lost, Walk The Beauty Way (Our Seven-Year Anniversary)

We all know how it goes. We wake up in the morning, and from the moment we open our eyes, something feels “off”. There’s a barrage of anxious thoughts about work and laundry and that text we forgot to respond to yesterday. Where did these thoughts come from? Why are they slamming us now, before our feet even touch the floor? We don’t know. We just know that there’s already a feeling of dread within, and we haven’t even looked at our email or news feed yet. We feel lost and afraid; what can we do to bring even the ...
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When You’re Scared to Try, Remember This

Have you ever felt the desire to take a shot at something new – a job, a relationship, a dream – but then automatically shut yourself down? Ever told yourself, I’m not good enough or It’s too hard; I’ll never figure it out, so why bother…? If you’re scared to try, then I have a video story just for you. …
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True Recovering Perfectionist? Then Press Play!

“We fear losing other people’s approval. We’re so scared of that, that’s so terrifying to us! But what actually hurts a lot more is when we completely reject ourselves.” This is a quote from my recent appearance on Claire Barton’s podcast, in an episode titled True Recovering Perfectionist. …
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The Theology of Audrey Hepburn and Pippin the Deer

Recently I was at a medical appointment and the nurse asked me about my religious affiliation. The question took me aback, in part because I wasn’t expecting it and in part because I didn’t know how to answer it. How could I be honest and also fit my answer into a box on the intake form? The words stuck in my throat. …
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Put On Your Own Mask First (Yes, You Really Can)

“Nice try,” the counselor said with a kind smile. “But there’s one thing … ” He bent his head to write on my paper, and I frowned. I’d labored over the words of the affirmation, trying hard to get them exactly right. It was one of my first workshops at The Clearing, the residential rehab where I spent a month learning how to heal the underlying core issues that drive substance abuse. (Though I didn’t use drugs, my work as a digital copywriter and some unexpected struggles opened a door for me to participate in the program.) Our participant group ...
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For the Ones Who Hide Away When They’re Struggling

“Hi friend, how are you doing today? Thinking of you and sending love your way.” I press send on the text, then click my phone screen off. I know better than to expect an immediate response from friends who hide away when they’re struggling. My friend deals with depression and anxiety, and I know that this is a challenging time for her. I also know that when things get tough she tends to go dark. Still I send the message and the love anyway. I pray that it can help her to defy the voices that tell her that she’s ...
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Set Boundaries and Declare Dominion: You Need to Read with Anna Kunnecke (Plus a Book Giveaway!)

Let’s start our conversation about how to set boundaries and declare dominion in the most logical place: with the dream I had the other night about owning a living, breathing miniature elephant. (We’re going somewhere with this, I promise.) I’d had the tiny elephant for a few days, and I’d thought that I was taking pretty good care of it. But then I placed a container of water down on the floor where the elephant lived, and the little guy went crazy. Within seconds it was splashing and guzzling water, equal parts desperate with thirst and wild with joy. That ...
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When You Want to Apologize for Existing

“I say ‘I’m sorry’ a LOT, usually when it’s not necessary. I apologize for existing.” “I’m so tired of fighting myself … For the last 17 years I spend my days in service to precious elders and give all that I can, yet inside me I feel like I am never, ever enough. The perfectionist in me doesn’t seem to be silenced.” “I’m so very, very, very tired Caroline! …. I’m at war with myself and know deep down I don’t have to be.”* …
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What Happens When You Surrender to Stillness: A Story

It was the best birthday present I could have given myself: an hour to just be. There I was in restorative yoga, lying on my purple mat, posed to surrender to stillness. In case you haven’t tried it, restorative yoga is a sublime form of deep rest that releases tension on every level. I love my local studio’s class, but I don’t go much. The poses are deceptively simple, so often I convince myself I could do them at home. But of course I am a recovering perfectionist and workaholic, so you can imagine the result of that rationalization. ...
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Can’t Stop Striving? Your Free Perfectionist Recovery Toolkit Is Here!

I knew I was a perfectionist the day I got into a car crash on the way to high school. The accident totaled our family’s pretty blue Chrysler Concorde, and I wasn’t in great shape either. Thankfully I didn’t sustain significant physical injuries, but I was hyperventilating, trembling, and generally traumatized. Still, my tears were barely dry when I insisted on going straight to school. Why? Well, I thought that since I’d already screwed up by getting into the accident and missing two classes, taking a day off was out of the question. Though I would never have asked a ...
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